NSFW (not safe for work)

Insect count: 0! (MMM!)

T5B: 1) I had gone to the bank before so I was able to afford my doctor visit. 2) I eventually got into the doctor and he spoke English. 3) I waited all morning and emailed work about my SLP but then got an email from Hashimoto-s telling me that tomorrow is Friday classes so since I'm at the Deaf school those days, I don't have classes tomorrow. That means I can prepare for Wednesday and Thursday. Thank goodness! 4) I survived my traumatic experience at the gyno. 5) I get to rest one more day (since they didn't give me an SLP and said I would have all of tomorrow to prep).

Now, NSFW usually marks things on the internet of nakedidity. I am using it because I am going to tell you about my visit to the gynecologist. I will try not to be TOO explicit, but I wanted you to be warned. So... I did not sleep well last night. It was so hot I was having trouble staying asleep. I should have gotten up and turned on the a/c but I was worried it would wake me too much and I would have an even harder time getting back to sleep (once I even managed to get there), so I would put on my fan timer and go back to sleep. I woke up a little before my alarm was set to go off and groggily tried to get ready. I was so exhausted and stressed I felt bone weary. I felt like giving up. However the chance of answers and my cramps FINALLY going away spurred me on. I fed Donut and got ready and it took me so long I didn't have a chance to eat breakfast (truth be told, I still haven't eaten much today - it's been that rough). I found out last night that the gyno clinic was pretty far too so I wanted to head out early. Here apparently everything is in clinics and it's first in, first served. So I got there 3 minutes after they opened the doors (8h33) and 27 minutes before they opened. I was feeling good about my place but then I didn't get called for the first 2.5 hours. I had brought a book (thank goodness for that prompting to my brain dead mind this morning). However, that was time I couldn't spend on my SLPs. Around 10h00, I sent an email to the office informing them I had yet to receive an SLP. At 11h00, when I got called back, I STILL didn't have an SLP. However, at least I was in! When they let me in, there was a second waiting room. I sat down on the couch and just started laughing. (Maybe a little hysteria? lol) It was so ridiculous and yet it was what it was. After 30 minutes, a nurse approached me and spoke to me in Japanese. No idea. Then another approached me and said something that was supposed to be English, I think, but I still had no idea. Suddenly a third nurse pops her head out, "I need to collect a urine sample." OOOOH! So off I went to a bathroom. (I got a picture of the pee cup because it was cracking me up.) After my urine sample, I waited some more. Then suddenly I was called in. I succinctly explained my situation to the doctor, he asked some questions (thank goodness he speaks English!) and then told me he wanted to do an exam. *gulp* Ok...

(Here is the NSFW paragraph) They ushered me into a booth and had me take off my shoes, shorts, and garments. Then into a chair I went that had stirrups. The nurse said something and motioned upwards. "Oh I'm going up? Daijobu." I went up, and up, and up. It was unnerving. My head was near the ceiling! In another news.... flying vagina!! LOL In any case, the doctor then showed up, sprayed me with some cold water and suddenly all sorts of poking and prodding. It was SO painful. Here I come complaining about cramps and then all sorts of instruments are being stuck into me. He took swabs, told me my cervix was red and puffy (inflamed I'm assuming is the word an English speaking doctor would have used). After some reading (be warned there are pictures: Inflamed Cervix) it makes sense why he said he was testing for chlamydia. But I don't have it! I can tell him now. In any case, after taking all sorts of swabs (one of which I think was a pap smear) he did in interior ultrasound. By then I had tears running down my face because the exam was so painful for me (and for girls who haven't been to the gynecologist yet who are reading this - my first visit wasn't like this - it's uncomfortable, but not excruciating). Not only that, it was just so invasive and ... it's just hard. They offered me a half curtain to hide my face from the doctor but I felt like that would be even scarier. I wanted to be able to see. It was so rough for me. I wanted so badly for someone I loved to be with me so I could feel a LITTLE normalcy. In any case, he told me that in feeling manually and with the ultrasound that he didn't feel any cysts on my ovaries. Then he told me my uterus is malformed. It's y shaped. (Y Shaped Uterus) After all that, he swabbed me a little to dry me off and had me put my clothes back on. He then showed me on the ultrasound the malformation of my uterus and said he needed to know the fluctuations of my base body temperature. He told me I could buy the thermometer there and said it was a special women one, which made me fear it would need to be inserted vaginally but he followed with, that needed to go under the tongue and showed very precisely the temperature of the body. He sent me off with a nurse who took me upstairs. It took FOREVER for her to explain to me how to use the recording instrument they had. It was all in kanji and she had to go get a dictionary to tell me what half the stuff was. Then I had to look it up on the internet since I had no idea what it was anyway under the scientific terms! One funny moment though: she tried to act one out and was rubbing her hand on her chest and throwing her head back and forth. "Masturbation?" I guessed. LOL luckily she didn't understand as when we looked it up it was "frustrating." ... I hope she doesn't experience a lot of frustration. Weird. In any case, when I left I was in tears again because I had notes (abnormally shaped uterus, inflamed cervix, not pregnant ~ he tested and told me, but DUH) but no plan of attack. I wish he would have said, "If your temperature turns out to be like xyz, this is what we will do. If it is abc, this is what we will do." No. It was, come back in two weeks (which I can't do since I will be at work, but the following Saturday I am to go down. So yay? I get to get up early that day.) I hate not having answers. Then I was taken downstairs, charged $65, got the thermometer and went home.

When I got home, I cried and cried and luckily was able to speak to my bff. That helped me a LOT. I ate a couple breadsticks and some edamame. In the meantime I am still in enormous pain and now my vagina aches! However, I am still alive and hopefully the doctor will have answers for me when I go back. I got home at 3 hours to the minute that I walked into the clinic (getting home was faster, thank goodness, since it was mostly downhill). I was overheated and in tears but I have on the dehumidifier and I'm feeling less emotional now. I got that email mentioned above in the afternoon from the school and then Interac informed me at 1510. Sheesh! Make me wait more than half the day. Stressful. In any case, I now have time to plan (hopefully) for Wednesday-Friday tomorrow. Breaking news! I just got my SLP for Chokaku Shien and it should be easy to prepare for it tomorrow or later in the week.

Well my day is ending poorly it seems. I still feel violated from before, my friends are being mean to me, and I though I already cried at the doctor's office and when I got home, here I am crying again. Why do people just THINK? "Ann had an awful day. I know! I should treat her like crap. THAT will help!" :,C I am in SERIOUS need of some TLC. I hope you are all doing MUCH better than me. XOXO, A

the pee cup is still funny