Exceeding expectations

Insect count: another giant dragonfly (I managed not to yell this time!), little flying bugs

T5B: 1) My last three classes went SUPER well. 2) My one class that went poorly can be improved. :) 3) I finished my game for tomorrow in record time. 4) It was the hottest day at the school yet, but I survived it. Not only that, the heat stroke warning was blinking this morning and I didn't get heat stroke! Take THAT Japan! 5) I got to speak to various students today.

Basal (found out I was writing it wrong - and here's a link - check out that chart and see why I feel justified when I told the doctor my period was ongoing. "No blood?" "No, but it hasn't ended. I still have cramps, etc!") temp: 36.67 ~ which is funny to me as I woke up feeling much cooler than yesterday but my temp was hotter.

Today started out well. I woke up not overheated though I had to write in my notes that I had had several stress dreams. They were strange. I even had a dream within a dream (stress dream) before I woke up. In my dream I woke up and it was 6h23 so I had a few minutes to relax before I had to get up and then my alarm went off! Then I realized I hadn't even checked my phone to see what time it was, I had just known in my dream. But my brain is a few minutes off I guess. In any case, I took my temperature, mourned that I didn't get to lie in bed for a few more minutes and then got up. I forgot to mention yesterday, but I found my bus pass at school. That is, I went to put away all the papers I had ... deranger? How do you say that in English? Taken out of place? And it fell out! They were papers from the pocket where I knew I had put the card. I have NO idea how it managed to hide from me as I went through all those papers. Still, I was ecstatic to find it, and I used it this morning. (I also had enough time to cook myself breakfast again. - It's funny, my stomach is a 2-3 year old. Or a teenager. What I mean is, when I got up my tummy said, "I want sausage and eggs!" By the time I cooked it, my tummy said, "What!? I don't want sausage and eggs!? Why did you make that!?" Yes you did! Do! Eat! LOL So I had sausage and eggs for breakfast.)

The wait at the bus was slightly nerve-wracking. I arrived two minutes ahead of time but without no-pants (the girl who wears shirt that barely cover her underwear to work) was nowhere in sight and neither were my students. I was afraid my bus had come early. Luckily it hadn't, it showed up, I got on, and I had a pleasant ride to school. I studied Japanese and filled out my tithing forms.

When I got to the school, I had time to make it to the morning meeting. YAY! I was able to say good morning with everyone else. After that I got busy making copies. Hashimoto-s approached me while I was making copies and wanted to talk to me/help me. It totally threw off my groove. Then he wanted to change the lesson. Dude, you gave it to me YESTERDAY. I cranked out a plan as best I could and now it's already printed (I already had the copies when he walked in). Turns out he knows Japanese students better than me. *Sigh. I don't think it was pride that got me, it's just that I assumed the students would be more like me. In any case, that story in a minute. He hung around and chatted with me while I copied and then left. After that, I gathered myself at my desk and waited for class time to arrive. I was scheduled to teach my new lesson first thing (first period). Oh man... as I mentioned it did NOT go as I planned. Part of the problem was it was my first lesson back and I was unduly nervous. The other thing is it's always easier to see the holes in your lesson AFTER you teach it the first time. So I am changing how I teach it completely and uttering a silent apology to that first class. Sorry guys! I did the best I could. After the class I apologized to Hashimoto-s and said I should have just listened to him and not assumed they would be like me.

After that class, I had a free period. I used half of it cooling down. After I did that, I couldn't convince myself to do any work. Just too hot - my energy was sapped. "Besides," I told myself, "You're teaching third period and only have 20 minutes at this point anyway. So I waited and fanned myself. Then came my next and hardest class (my rowdiest one).

This class is my sports class. If I am off for one SECOND they eat me alive. They were the ones who insinuated I smelled as well. *shakes head* They are so much fun if they work with me though! I went in swinging, and swept most of the class with me! In fact, the kid who NEVER participates, wrote what he did for his summer vacation! Well, in that corner four boys wrote the exact same thing. HOWEVER, they WROTE. I call it a win. Only one student in the class didn't participate. It's still a major win. :D After that class I had a free period and then lunch. I MEANT to do something - but again just cooled off. Almost the entire faculty was watching the finale game for the high boys' baseball. It's SERIOUS stuff here. I'd say akin to the superbowl, but you have to find people who love it as much as you. Here, nearly everyone was standing in silence watching the game like their lives depended on it. Then, the wrong school won. In fact, since everyone cleared out with not a word I figured the team we wanted to win hadn't, but as I said when I asked Oikawa-s he answered, "The bad guys won." 0.o serious stuff this baseball! Yipes. I, once again, didn't get anything done. In fact, I barely noticed the passage of time. When the lunch bell rang, I ate all my lunch (:D) and then TRIED to get myself to work but couldn't. Next thing I knew, 5th period arrived.

5th period was SO much fun! I was teaching with Suzuki-s. He was cracking the students up today. (I don't know what he said since it was in Japanese.) He mentioned my name and then "senpuki" (which is the word for electric fan) and then went to the back of the room and put it up front so it would blow on me. I felt flattered and worried. I am a teacher, yes, but it's their class fan and I felt bad for monopolizing it. In my defense, it wasn't my idea! And actually as I walk around a lot, I wasn't standing in the stream, as it were, that often. However, I was very grateful to the students and Mr. Suzuki as it was extremely hot today. The class went went and then we got to the game. The game was charades and as I mentioned a LONG time ago (since it's been a month since I was teaching), my first class absolutely, barnone REFUSED to play since I was trying to get them to do their charades in groups. I decided I would be a one-woman show. Oh man, they LOVED it. I don't mind going WAY out on a limb (it's for education!) and they really appreciated that. They especially loved with I mimed "singing." In fact, I think they waited to answer so long because they loved laughing at me so much. LOL I really had a blast though. Also! One very reluctant learned raised his hand and got his team a point for guessing correctly. "Ann is sitting!" :D ~ Oh and at one point I dropped the chalk and immediately said, "Gomen!" They loved that.

Right after that, I was teaching 6th period. Same lesson, last time, new teacher. The lesson started out a bit weird as Hashimoto-s explained the core concept in Japanese (which he didn't do for this lesson in the other two classes of his I taught), but I waited til he was finished and then got on with it. It threw me off my groove a little though. In any case, same thing as the last class. They LOVED my charades. Two especially funny ones: I mimed throwing a ball three or four times but no guesses. So I mouthed gomen a few times to this boy, picked up his eraser, and threw it across the room. Everyone dissolved into shrieks of laughter. The eraser bounced high and landed a foot from his desk (and this is all the way across the room to back all that distance! That eraser was a champ!). I picked it up, mouthed gomen and arigatou and gave it back. The other was when I was doing "walking." I was walking back and forth, but at the end of the wooden riser, I pivoted. Well I heard the students saying, "Dancing! Dancing!" And I thought, "Seriously!? You think I dance like THIS!?" Sure enough, they guessed that. I did the Japanese no - smells bad, then pointed to the boys that were saying dancing and then actually danced a little hip hop. I know, I'm prideful. In any case, they were all very impressed. "Sugoi!! Wow!!" :D Made me feel great! And now I've danced for two classes... lol

When I got back to my desk, I set about cooling down again. 2 rooms of 40 students plus two instructors with no wind and 31° day that bounced between 50-55% humidity.. ick. (At least the humidity was 30% lower than yesterday - I feel quite blessed in that regard.) Finally I realized at some point that I needed to prepare my game for tomorrow. So I reluctantly put down my sensu (hand held, folding fan), but realized it was too hot without it. I worked with it. I got most of the game done by cleaning time, helped with cleaning time, then finished. Oh but before I did that, when I got back from class, I needed some water. I grabbed my water bottle and went to the hall. I asked four students to tell me how to say thirsty in Japanese. (The whole thing was a small conversation in Japanese.) They taught me: nodo ga kawaitta. I have no idea if I spelled that correctly and if the student who told me is playing a joke on me or not. Probably not, but you never know. In any case, I love it when my students teach me Japanese. They get to be the teacher and I get to be the student. It also shows them I'm interested. I asked some other students during cleaning time what a word meant that I had heard all day: shokkuin. They weren't able to tell me, but after asking Oikawa-s, I told them, "Staff!" :D Then I saw the student I had seen on the train before. I said, "I saw you on the train! Uh... densha de mimashita!" He looked confused and so I figure I said it wrong. I know faces though. And it WAS him. :)

Around 16h00, all the teachers disappeared to a meeting. Moniwa-s asked me what time I leave (and I learned a new word: deru). I started to say "40" *wince* yon juu, but then corrected myself as the VP did, "Yoji han!" (16h30) So they said ok and left me there. I finished my game, then took my leave. One weird thing: as I was leaving, I ran into a guy in uniform. He looked startled like I'd caught him at something and bowed a lot and said hello to me. I bowed back and walked away like... "What the!?" The bus ride home was very dispiriting for me. I got some unexpected (HIGHLY) news, and it feels like no one is available to talk to me anymore. I was able to text my mom a little this morning (hope your first day back goes well Maman! gros bisous!), but everyone's in bed by the time I get off work. I'm brain dead in the morning, so by the time I want to have someone to talk to, everyone is going to sleep. And the opposite applies to me. When everyone is getting up, I am going down. :c Today was harder as I was told that very thing. They cut me off saying they had to go to bed. It REALLY sucks being so far sometimes. I'm on the opposite time schedule so I don't get to talk to anyone at home (typically) until the weekends. And the last two weekends I haven't gotten to skype my parents. And I hadn't heard from one of my BFFs for a VERY long time. I just don't know how to NOT feel lonely. I like alone time, but I don't like to feel like I'm alone. I can sit in my apartment and read or watch Code Geass, but then I want to talk to someone about it. :( I just don't know how to get away from this feeling. It makes me worried about another year in Japan. It would be great for learning the language and cementing friendships, and seeing more of the country, but while I continue to fight this huge, intangible demon of loneliness, it feels like a REALLY bad idea. However, I can tell I have grown a lot. I had a job where I worked 8 hour shifts alone. That did NOT end well. And that was only two or three months. So lasting 5 months like this (if you knew me before) is a veritable miracle. It still managed to take the shine off my day though. I had a wonderful day and wanted to share it with someone. Instead, I rode the bus home, got to say hello to Donut, ate my dinner, and watched a couple episodes of season 2 of Code Geass. I wish I had someone to talk to everyday. In the meantime, I will continue to pray to find an antidote to this loneliness. SOMETHING I can do. Hope none of you are feeling lonely! :) XOXO, A